I'm somebody who likes things to make sense. I think of myself as one of the rare gems of the feminine persuasion who can actually be logical, think things through...you know, reason. That is, during all but a few select days per month when I am unable to will my emotions into the passenger seat.
Being a reasonable, logical, sensible woman, I can usually manage to make sense of the varied occurrences in my day-to-day. I suppose usually has just been identified as a key word. Time and time again, when I return to this now too familiar place where nothing makes any sense, I am reminded of something I have rediscovered countless times, probably throughout countless lives. I know the path to soul freedom.
I have discovered a path for myself, thought it through, reasoned it out, and truly believe I have been led to a scientific way to free myself from the senses and their accompanying delusory nature.
The only thing I have to do is apply the practice of meditation, add a heart full of devotion, stir gently with a specific and proven scientific method for controlling the life force and I am guaranteed to be speeding myself toward the bliss of union with the divine. Sounds pretty simple. Like something one might clamor to get the chance to attempt, right? Wrong, and here is what doesn’t make any sense; I don’t attempt it with even a fraction of the regularity with which I stumble back to the same realization.
Time and again I am drawn in by my worldy desires and happily skip along, apparently blessed with the good karma of past right action, until it is utterly necessary to have everything stop making sense. When life, people, conversations, and observations start failing to add up and I cannot understand anything, I am forced to recall the only reason we humans are different from other animals. We have reason and free will. We don’t have to be driven by the senses, our desires, emotions, and whims. We are free to choose peace, but who has the time to actually stop and make a second for the most important thing of all? Certainly not a reasonable, gainfully employed, single mother of two. I have more excuses if those won’t suffice.
And there you have it!
