I Forgot My ABCs

I hatched a plot to try to spur myself on to writing my blog daily. I was going to pick a word each day that began with consecutive letters in the alphabet. I only made it to A. What does that say about me?
Rather than dwell on that, I've decided to write about how I feel today. I feel lonely. Yes, I know that sounds somewhat pathetic - even to me. But, as if that makes things any better, I have reasons to feel that way.

1. I'm in a huge house all by myself.
2. My baby daughter moved away just a couple of weeks ago.
3. My first born son also moved away just before that.
4. My mom was visiting for two glorious weeks and I just dropped her at the airport.
5. The man I love, who could be here with me if he wanted to, is at his house, with his stuff, doing his thing.

(As much as that last one frustrates me sometimes, I wonder what it might be like if I felt more inclined toward solitude. Then my current situation might not seem so undesirable. I might be basking in the glory of entertaining only the most selfish whims.)
Anyway, feeling sorry for myself is a waste of time. So is wishing things were other than as they are. I always find my way back to the notion that there is some Master Plan and that "obstacles" just may be opportunities in clever disguise.
I heard two country songs on my way home from the airport tonight. One was about living like you were dying (being kinder, loving more openly, taking risks, appreciating everything), and the other was urging one to see the good in things and when given the chance to sit it out or dance, to dance. I've always wondered why it is people appreciate things most when they've lost them...why not when it matters most, while they still have them? And, I've never minded dancing all by myself, and in fact, that's usually been my favorite way to dance and brought me great joy. So I think I'll live my life as it is this very moment; appreciate what I have. And, I think I'll dance. All by myself. 
And there you have it.